Your Happiness Factor

Your Happiness Factor:celebrating happiness, prosperity, hearth and home, good health.

Wednesday, 3 May 2017

Active Listening and Good Communication

Active Listening and good communicationBuilding relationships at work and at home depends upon good communication. This includes the ability to really "hear" what the other person is trying to say. if you practice the skill of active listening, you will be able to communicate better.

In coaching we spend a lot of time thinking about active listening – for us it is a core skill. Active listening is hearing with engagement. In active listening you work to not just to hear the words, but to understand exactly what the other person is trying to say.

Active listening helps the other person to feel appreciated and respected. It helps them to have trust.

Active listening is a skill that requires practice but here are some tips to help you on your way.

  1. Position - be somewhere where you can see and be seen by your hearer for important messages. Talking one to one, or in small groups, sit up straight or lean forward slightly to show your attentiveness through body language.
You can read the rest of this post at this link http://wp.me/p6V6rl-1lK

Wendy Smith is a career consultant, life coach and business coach with depth of experience in organisational development, management, coaching and personal development. That experience means she is equally at home helping clients find a new career direction, starting-up new businesses or dealing with life’s more challenging personal issues. You can contact her at wendy@wisewolfcoaching.com

Wendy has written a little eBook on how to get on with your boss and a book on job search - you can find all her books on Amazon at this link

         

Friday, 21 April 2017

The Resilient Mindset – don’t let a fixed mindset defeat you

The Resilient Mindset – don’t let a fixed mindset defeat you

How to thrive in times of change

This is a challenging time for all of us. For many times are hard and the world has become a frightening place. So can you survive mentally intact and thrive?

How do you develop a resilient mindset?

Well accepting that we all have core values that we want to carry through life, most other parts of our thinking can changed. And a mind that is prepared to change and take on the requirements of new circumstances has most chance of staying intact. It is time to learn to challenge your own thinking.

A fixed mindset will chatter away in your head, if you let it.  It will tell you all the reasons why you shouldn't change. It is also likely to fill your head with negativity. It will tell you why you are not up tot he task of change. An, slowly it will erode your confidence.

The nasty fixed mindset will tell you that even if you wanted to change, you couldn’t do it! It might whisper that you’re not bright enough! You are not strong strong enough!  Or it might hint that if you change people won't love you any more.

Now sit back coolly and start answering back. Are any of those doubts founded in reality? Think of things that you have achieved in the past.


Time for you to start answering back.


“Well I’m certainly bright enough – if I see the need for change, I’m bright enough to do it.  I can learn and I can find people who will help and advise me.  I can learn and the people about me will probably like the new me! If not, well they will have to accept I have the right to be happy.”

You fixed mindset will probably answer; “But what happens if and when you fail?

So here is your defense.  “Everyone fails sometimes. But I’ll do it well and I’ll manage the risks – so I’ve got every chance of success.”

“But” says your fixed mindset, “if you don’t make the change, you can’t fail.”

“No, but, if I don’t try, I’ve failed already!

Now your fixed mindset sneers and becomes cunning.  “Oh so it is going to be easy for you then!”

You smile wryly.  “No it isn’t going to be easy.  Nothing worth having comes easy. I’m going to do it anyway”

Push the negativity back into the shadows where it deserves to be! If you keep beating it back, at some point your fixed mindset will slink away.  It won’t be dead. It may emerge occasionally when you are feeling tired or frustrated. But you have the upper hand now.  You know you have to find the energy to take up your sword and beat it back into the shadows again.

With practice you can learn to think positively and confidently about your change.  You will develop a resilient mindset.

You can do it! You can make the change you desire – it is time to start believing. Reach for your sword and begin practicing.

Wendy Smith is a career consultant, life coach and business coach with depth of experience in organisational development, management, coaching and personal development. That experience
means she is equally at home helping clients find a new career direction, starting-up new businesses or dealing with life’s more challenging personal issues. You can contact her at wendy@wisewolfcoaching.com

Wendy has written a little eBook on how to get on with your boss and a book on job search - you can find all her books on Amazon at this link

         

Wednesday, 19 April 2017

How to get promoted

How To Get Promoted – are you doing well in your present role but feel ready for the next step up? Even in this tough economic climate some people are still managing to get promotion. But how do you make yourself part of that √©lite group? 

Today over on our sister site we have a two post series on how to get that precious promtion.  Here is a link to Part 1 – link


Wendy Smith is a career consultant, life coach and business coach with depth of experience in organisational development, management, coaching and personal development. That experience means she is equally at home helping clients find a new career direction, starting-up new businesses or dealing with life’s more challenging personal issues. You can contact her at wendy@wisewolfcoaching.com

Wendy has written a little eBook on how to get on with your boss and a book on job search - you can find all her books on Amazon at this link

         

Wednesday, 3 August 2016

Getting to know people and making assumptions!

Getting to know people and making assumptions

Most of us encounter lots of other people all the time in our everyday life.  We pass them in the street. We sit in the same cinema, or  work in the same building. And some among them, we actually start to acknowledge and get to know. We begin to recognise their faces, the shapes of their bodies and how they move. We start to make assumptions about them, usually based on our very first encounter with them.

In fact most of us make up our minds in the first few seconds of the encounter. Based on the clothes they are wearing on that particular day and the expression of their face, we decide. Is this someone I am likely to trust and want to know better? And we act on what we think are the answers to those questions, based on our assumptions.
What we are doing, of course, is taking a few stray facts and fitting them into our own patterns of belief. We base those beliefs;

  • on what we were told by our parents and others when we are young, 
  • on what we have read or been taught formally 
  • on what we have experienced (increasingly on tv, in the media or on-line).
Interesting this isn't it? This is what we do. So, what do you think other people do when they encounter us?

Well of course, they to make assumptions too. They set us up against their personal frame of reference!

Now, you and I both know that the frame of reference we use can be quite risky.

Most of us have picked all kind of prejudices and bits of wrong information along the way. For example, women of my mother's generation had the most awful suspicions of other women in red hats. I won't go into the detail but it wasn't very nice.

Most of the time we apply our frame of reference without conscious thought or question.

You can change. You can learn to hold back on making those kind of immediate judgements, if you wish. And I believe that is a very wise thing to do. Otherwise what interesting opportunities you may miss in life. What good people you may exclude.
It is wise as well, though, to keep in mind that people are making those kind of assumptions about us.. And we need to do our best to make sure that that first, abiding, impression is one we actually choose to make.

Wendy Smith is a Life Coach with Career and Business Coaching
career coach, life coach
skills. She helps people have the confidence they need to be successful at work while maintaining a good work/life balance. 

You can email her at wendy@wisewolfcoaching.com

or book your free taster coaching session with Wendy here

Tuesday, 12 July 2016

Is your tiredness due to dehydration?

Is your tiredness due to dehydration?

A recent survey found that one in five people suffering from fatigue were actually dehydrated. Usually this was because they were not drinking enough.

When you don't get enough fluids, the amount of blood in your blood vessels drops and your heart has to pump extra hard to pump blood round your body.  Remember we are made up of 70% water and all parts of your body, including essential organs like your brain, depend upon it. So drinking plenty of fluid is important.

But keep in mind that coffee and alcohol are diuretics and they actually dehydrate the body, So you need to balance them by drinking lots of good, fresh, water.

When you are dehydrated, you may feel weak and your urine is likely to be dark instead of pale yellow. 

Eating five portions of fruit and vegetables each day will help because they contain water. You should also drink 2 litres of water
every day - spread it through the day by drinking 200ml every 10 hours, if you can.

If you are worried about your tiredness, or this doesn't help, please consult your physician or health professional.

Wendy Smtith is a Life Coach with Career and Business Coaching skills. She helps people have the confidence they need to be successful at work while maintaining a good work/life balance. You can email her at wendy@wisewolfcoaching.com

Book your free taster coaching session with Wendy here