Skip to main content


Showing posts with the label Roles

Relationships – Who vacuums in your house?

(Photo credit: kalavinka ) Relationships – Who vacuums in your house? Isn’t it odd?  Most studies find, that although the number of working women continue to rise, it is still women who carry out most of the domestic chores. Now vacuuming, more than most other task, seems to cause most heat and not in a particularly nice way. Yes, men do vacuum but they seem to expect women to be grateful that they do! When you think about it, isn’t that a bit strange?  Yes, if both parties go out to work, it is great that they share tasks.  But why should one partner be more grateful than the other? In the kind of coaching I do (cognitive behavioural coaching) we have a concept of distorted thinking.  One of the most common distortions is around a core belief about “ Should, Musts, Have to's and Oughts”. We grow up with beliefs about other people and how they should behave. When they don’t, we get angry – this could be passive- aggressive anger or outright violence. We usually lear